Flowers tell the story this week.  I hope you don’t mind.

I was having another stuck Sunday this week.

I was struggling with a bit of trouble deciding what to write, letting my brain run forward to Thursday.  (I guess I didn’t realize we weren’t there yet.)  I was feeling out of sorts, planning and fretting about what needed to be done, and feeling cheated that I wasn’t enjoying the remaining hours of my weekend.

So, after an hour of this, I decided I needed a bit of a mindfulness break.  So I took a walk in my backyard and discovered what was blooming back there.

(You might be surprised at what can bloom in the midst of a Texas summer.  Take a look at the pictures below.)

On my walk around the yard, I took some clippings. I brought them inside, put them in tiny vases, and set them on my desk while I wrote.

I realized that a three minute walk and a few trimmings had made a tremendous difference in my mood.  And I had some ideas, wishes for you and me.  Here’s what came to mind:

Time together, time apart

I like how these flowers fell into the vase.  They seemed to tell a story, two leaning together and one off to the side, alone.  They’re such cheerful little things, content alone and together.

Everyone needs a different blend of time together with others and time alone.  Consider the week ahead.  Do you have enough of each, and in the proportions you’d like?

And what about the relationships in your life?  We receive so many messages about the importance of having a special someone that sometimes I think we forget about the joy of our own company.  It is a valuable skill to find joy in your own company, and to fill your life with people who bring you joy, too.

Take up some space

These flowers are leggy and a bit wild.  I found several of them striding haphazardly across the yard. 

A client once told me she had the hardest time taking shopping carts into the grocery store.  She told me that she started doing it to limit how much she purchased, so she could get by on her modest budget.  But over time, we came to realize that it had to do with something bigger: a part of her was afraid of taking up too much space.  She told me that she didn’t want to get in anyone’s way.

It was a useful tactic at first.  But over time, she often found her basket was filled with necessities well before she had finished shopping.  She was tired, and clamoring to keep items from spilling out of the basket she carried.  She often felt harried and frustrated by the end of her trip, sometimes even choosing not to purchase needed items because her burden was too heavy.

Don’t be afraid to take up some space—whether it is in the grocery store, in a relationship, or in your own life.  You have a right to be here as much as anyone.

Have an anchor

You can’t tell from this picture, but these flowers grow in heavy bunches that weigh down the fronds they grow on.

Purpose and meaning help anchor us when times get tough and life feels uncertain.  There are lots of ways to find anchors in life: in the safe haven of a meaningful relationship, while cultivating a career of purpose, or living in touch with your values and principles.

Do you have solid anchors in your life?

The moral of the story

Getting unstuck and finding kindness doesn’t require big and frantic efforts.  It can be as simple as:

Some flower clippings in a tiny vase. 

A short walk in your backyard. 

A few quiet minutes in the company of your own mind.

I hope you find and share many kindnesses with yourself this week.

PS:  In case you are wondering from last week:  my toilet is fine.  The good enough scrub has seen it through the week.  I’m finding many other tasks and chores are quite forgiving and that good enough suits them well.  Have you tried your hand at good enough yet?