As we discussed last week, your most important job is practicing good self-care.

After all, if you don’t take good care of yourself, you won’t be of much use to anyone else.

So, all the mothers and fathers out there, all the healers and caregivers and healthcare professionals, take heed:

regular self-care practice is NOT selfish.

Parents & caregivers, it is part of responsible parenting and caregiving.

Professionals, it is part of responsible practice.

If you’re living a life without these important protections in place, it’s like you’re driving a car with no brakes!

Not a good idea.

Airplanes supply special stores of oxygen in a crisis.

But as we meander through our weeks, our work, and our relationships, we must bring our own oxygen.

Types of oxygen

So, what does self-care look like in your daily life?

Consider the different domains of your life that need tending to: physical, emotional & mental, spiritual.

Physical

+ three healthy meals a day, plus snacks, and time to eat them

+ some form of exercise at least a few times a week

+ enough restful sleep each night (including a sane bedtime)

+ adequate and timely medical care & rest when you are sick

+ responsible use of alcohol & other substances, if used at all

Emotional & mental

+ attending counseling when extra support is needed

+ reading, writing or journaling

+ relaxation exercises & other coping skills to build resilience

+ making time for leisure activities, particularly hobbies that are creative and fulfilling

+ participating in respectful & nourishing relationships

Spiritual

+ participation in regular spiritual or religious practice aligned with your personal beliefs through prayer, ritual, services, or contemplative practice alone or with others

+ time & space to reflect on and develop your personal belief system over time

+ cultivating a relationship with a higher power, with nature, or with anything that gives you a sense of wonder, meaning and perspective in life

How to do it:  your own brand of oxygen

Based on your lifestyle and personality, you can put together a menu of coping options that can act as your very own brand of oxygen.

Some of these things will be more or less portable—you can practice deep breathing nearly anywhere, and a small knitting project can be secreted in a purse or back pocket most places.

Other practices may require more time and space.

And some of your oxygen isn’t activities but the company of certain precious people.

The people you can be around when the @%^& hits the fan.

The people you want to pick up the phone and call and cry to. (This list may or may not include pets, too.)

But whether they’re practices or people, having a menu of coping options handy will help when you’re feeling stuck or stressed.

It’s best to have a mix of resources, solo and shared, at your disposal.

In fact, the longer the list, the better.

And it can be hard to brainstorm about healthy constructive ways of coping when you’re in a funk.

So do yourself a favor and put this list together when you’re feeling calm.

You may be surprised at how many options you can come up with.

And, you may find this exercise is an invitation to try and cultivate some new coping methods and self-care practices, if you’re not happy with the ones you’re currently using.

PS: If you’re a caregiver of some kind—a doctor, nurse, psychologist, massage therapist—I am looking at you, people. You are some of the worst culprits when it comes to self-care! (Believe me, I know, it is something I struggle with all the time.) Don’t give lip service to this life-preserving practice.

Take it like vitamins for your soul.

Because self-care is an act of survival.

Because not doing it is a form of self-neglect.

Because you’re worth it.

————————————-

Two years ago:  You can be firm without being mean

Three years ago:  Five reasons to take a vacation