What to do when your mind goes like this.

Today’s post rests squarely on some of my own stuff.

I’m doing a little heart housekeeping.  So, it’s a bit of a selfish post.

(You’ve been warned.)

Even so, I know I’m not the only person who deals with feeling unfocused and scattered from time to time.

And lately I’ve been driven to distraction by a couple of things.

So today I’ve put together a couple of gentle tips to help us gain some focus & clarity.

It’s time for us to gather up the scatter, to take our minds by four corners and gently fold inward.

Just for the moment.

Or, barring that, maybe we can just bring some humor and compassion to the task, as we watch our minds jump, like a squirrel among trees, from topic to topic.

(Some stuff just resists being gathered.)

Bring that squirrely mind over here for a moment & let’s have a chat, you and I.

I’ll talk first about my scatter, some (I’m needing to put it down on the page today)

—and then we can explore yours.

Scatter from firing on all cylinders

So what’s with all this scatter of mine?

I’ve been posting about bits and pieces here, on this blog.

A month ago, it was the launch of Counseling South Austin.

In case you missed it, that’s a practice I run that’s staffed by counseling interns offering sliding scale services.

I’m excited about the project, but it’s also made me a bit bananas.

And then I did a talk for the therapeutic community about building a practice with integrity, as part of the Mind Your Own Business conference.

It was online, via webinar, so I didn’t have to look directly into the eyes of the hundreds of participants watching (good & bad).

But it was a lot for my poor introvert heart. It was a lot of exposure.

And then I wrote & self-published an ebook on building a practice.

I was so excited about the talk from the conference, I wanted to continue the conversation. So I wrote & then promoted the ebook. I’m still doing the promoting part. More exposure there.

Hel-lo, scatter.

Hello, from the other side of comfort zone

These things all happened in July. This is hardly an ordinary month for me.

For me, as an introvert, this has me going full throttle & then some. Mostly because it involves a lot of exposure.

And I’ve written before about how lovely it is to be seen. But it can also be scary & draining.

So now my mind is an utter pinwheel, circling madly among possibilities:

Do I write another ebook?

Start an accountability group?

Retreat & become a complete hermit for the next couple of months & focus on my work with clients?

This is what I mean by scatter. It’s feeling flush with possibilities, feeling unsure of how best to proceed.

And it’s not always glamorous. Sometimes you’re standing at those metaphorical crossroads, crying in the rain, cue the sad music. It’s feeling anxious and uncertain and exposed.

Scatter doesn’t even have to be about having a couple of big irons in the fire.

All the day to day tasks that make up a life are great for scatter. All those big & little to-dos can conspire to swamp you.

These are the things I think of when I think of scatter. It may look different for you.

Gather up your scatter—3 handy how-to’s

So, you know what my scatter looks like. But how about you?

Is there anything (or anyone) in your life that’s particularly noisy, clamoring for attention?

(Parents, you can take this quite literally, or maybe it is metaphorical).

Are you feeling pulled in about 18 different directions?

Or pinned in place, stuck under the weight of all the things that need doing, unable to begin?

Here are a couple of things to try when you are feeling scattered.

1.) Notice & observe. Sometimes things shift simply when we direct attention toward them. I’m fond of posing questions to myself out loud, to help me think. You might prefer writing.

Whatever your method of inquiry, it’s fine as long as there’s space for you to observe, to ask yourself, “Hey, what’s going on in there?”

2.) Stop squeezing. Squeezing rarely helps me. Usually, when I power through a task, the end product is a bit lifeless. I find this is most often the case with writing, but I’m sure you can see it in other tasks, too.

Anyways—your mileage may vary. Sometimes it may be just what you need. But I find a little bit of patience and curiosity can usually shake things loose better than a fist over my own head.

3.) Set an intention. Does this sound a lot like a yoga class so far? Yeah, well, that’s not a coincidence. You have a better chance of gathering up your scatter if you’re deliberate.

Take a moment to peel yourself off the ceiling. Take the helm. Choose a thing—even if it’s choosing something just for this moment.

You don’t have to figure it all out right now.

You don’t have to do it all right now.

Just notice.

Stop squeezing.

Pick one thing.

That’s all.

Scatter-gathering: extra credit

Scatter can even be beautiful.

Since I’ve been struggling with scatter lately, I’ve decided to try an experiment.

Every day this week, before bed, I will take 5 minutes to write myself a letter that I can read the following morning.

In that letter, I will offer tips & encouragement of things to try on that day. I will soothe a couple of the worries I imagine waking up with.

There will also probably be some handwritten hearts in the margins.

I started last night, and I admit I was excited to wake up to my little letter. I left it on the kitchen counter, next to an empty coffee cup I had set out for myself.

This little letter writing campaign is part of my practice of setting intentions for the day. It’s also a big helping of self-compassion. I’m enjoying the experiment so far—I think I make a pretty good pen pal!

You’re welcome to try with me, too—if you like.

It doesn’t have to be a long letter, mind you.  Just a couple of encouraging lines, if you like.  Try it for a week, see what happens?

Best wishes to you as you gather up your scatter!